4 Tips for Building Confidence in a Transition

Between The Top of Your Game and Reinvention

Have you ever been at the top of your game and:

  • Graduated into adulthood to start your career?
  • Transitioned from the military to the civilian world?
  • Experienced a life-altering event that forced you to start over?
  • Decided to leave what you’ve always done to pursue an uncommon path?

In the space between what you left and what you were pursuing… Did you struggle?

Did you feel your confidence tanking as you: Worked to learn and define your new role and become successful at it, while navigating a culture and politics that were foreign to you?

Are you ready to pack dreams and reinvent?

A new year! A new you!

Earlier this week movers came to the home of our dear friends and packed everything they had to prepare for a move to another country.

  • It’s a great career opportunity for him.
  • It means more daily freedom for her.

But it’s still stressful.

  • Anticipation, doubt and fear swirl together about the unknowns.
  • And at the same time they process the emotions of an ending before the new beginning…

As 2015 comes to an end, you may be considering a new beginning, a fresh start, a change or a reinvention…

Would you say yes, If…

I published an article a month ago, about how our international move altered the path I thought I was on to my big dream. In that post I shared how much I trust in this altered path, even though it doesn’t make complete sense yet.

About the time I published that article I heard this quote,

Two weeks ago my husband and I took a vacation to Africa. On the plane I read Nelson Mandela’s book The Long Walk to Freedom, deeply considering how a wide variety of good and bad experiences changed his perspective, caused him to seek truth, ponder deeply, and shaped the man he would become. At several places in his story I thought of different struggles that others have faced that have taken them to their knees and challenged their perspectives and then changed their futures. In the midst of those reflections I wrote these words…

Would you say yes, if you knew:

  • That great risk would lead to a greater reward?
  • That a job loss would lead to a new career in a new industry?
  • That a heartbreaking betrayal would make you softer and stronger and wiser?
  • That learning to forgive would help you experience uncommon peace? 
  • That years of unwanted change and confusion would lead to growth? 
  • That an uncommon sacrifice would create the change you’ve dreamed of?
  • That an ending would create a better beginning?

Dealing with Change: Both Wanted & Unwanted

Will it kill you? Or will you thrive?

Once upon a time, I hired a fun-loving woman with great recommendations, strong experience, and impressive tenure. (True Story!)

Not long after she joined our team she began to struggle.   Things that she thought would be easy to learn were harder than normal, which chewed away at her confidence, which made it even harder to learn, which ate away even more confidence. Sometimes when we spoke privately, tears flowed.

At one point she shared that in her last role she was so confident that she would put on a pink feather boa. And when she wore it – everyone knew a special announcement was going to be made. Here she wanted to be her authentic self, but was afraid…

Each time we spoke, I would remind her:

  1. She was grieving. (She had just left a role that she knew backwards and forwards and upside down in a place where she felt understood, appreciated and loved and moved and started a new job.)
  2. She really was smart, capable, fun and wanted!
  3. She was focusing more on her mistakes and emotions than on what she knew she could bring and that was causing her to struggle harder.

The Impact of Vision without Ownership

Two real cities. One has it and one... Not so much!

A little over a week ago my husband and I rode motorcycle to a city that is about an hour away from where we are living.

It’s a city we visited for the first time nearly one year ago.  A city that provided such a powerful visual of how leadership or the lack of it, impacts our world that I wrote about it right after our first visit, and have continued to talk about it throughout the year…

  • A lack of a vision compared to a shared vision.
  • Chaos compared to order.
  • Anxiety compared to peace.
  • Darkness compared to light.
Read More About That Visit Here

This time we were in awe again: