Benefits of having Intentional Discussions about Tough Topics

communication, discussion, dialogue

Titled leaders and employees are happier and more successful when they learn how to have discussions that include deep listening and truth telling.   A failure to do either one equals missed opportunities for learning and growth.  (This is also true for family and community members.)

As a result,  I’ve been encouraging listening, thinking, and dialogue with increasing frequency and leveraging current events as examples of how we can do this.

As you watch the news, are you ever so aware of the pain and the division in our world that it is hard to think about anything else?  

Recently in my home country:  

  • A woman was set on fire because of her faith.
  • Two other women were punched because of their faith.
  • Bombs were set off and people were stabbed for their faith.
  • A man was killed because of the color of his skin.
  • Several men were killed because of the uniform they wear.

Some have responded with fear and hate for everyone that is not like them. 

Others deny that any problem exists and encourage blind acceptance.  


Do we really have only two options???

Fuel Fear or Avoid Fear


Replace The Dreaded Debate with the Adventure of a “Conversation Safari”

Last fall we took an African Safari. Prior to leaving, several friends, raved about their safari experiences, claiming that it was their most epic vacation, and numero uno on a list of several destinations.

When I asked why… One friend said it was because of the animals.

Interesting. I LOVE animals, but I’ve been to the zoo and and wildlife parks. How could simply being in Africa create an epic vacation?

Becoming a part of the solution, after Orlando

Becoming part of the solution, after Orlando

As the news about Orlando, and yet another hate crime swirls around us….

What are you seeing? What are you hearing? What are you pondering? What are you praying for?

Typically after events like this I invest major amounts of energy reading the news and contemplating the opinions and the blame game that follows.

How Outside Perspectives Can Reveal YOUR Purpose

How outside perspectives can help you clarify your purpose.

A few weeks ago I was guest hosting the Lead With Giants Tweet Chat with Dan Forbes.

When we asked the question, “What have you learned from considering another perspective?”  Lori King responded and indicated that 120 characters was not enough space to list all that she has and is learning.

Because perspectives fascinate me, I asked her if she would be willing to write more and allow me to share what she has learned about perspectives in a guest post. I’m delighted that she accepted.

It is fascinating that although I’ve spent a lot of time thinking and writing about how other perspectives increase understanding, and fuel intellectual and organizational growth, Lori’s post emphasizes how the perspective of others can help us find clarity about our purpose.

Below is her story…


Lori A. KingThree years ago, I made the decision to leave a business I started with a partner.

It started with a strong desire to take the summer off to spend time with my elementary aged children. I felt guilty for working when I was at work and I felt guilty at home when there was work to be done, which is all the time when you own a small business. The summer flew by and the next thing I knew, my kids were going back to school. I wasn’t refreshed, revitalized or ready to return to work. Instead, I dreaded going back.

You must do the thing you think you cannot do.I have an angel hanging next to my computer with this quote on it that my business partner gave me:

I had always loved it. I thought about the quote many times over the years applying it to this or that event; but, it never quite fit. As

I write this now, I know what it is I thought I couldn’t do. Leave.

And leave I did.

The process was a painfully slow awakening and one of the hardest things I have done.

While my children were in school, I had time to reflect and listen deeply to figure out what is my purpose in life. I was always too busy before to have the time to think in this manner.

  • I began meditating.
  • I read more books than ever.
  • I attended online webinars about topics I was interested.
  • I attended Twitter chats and became an ambassador to a popular chat on the world of work.

As time went by, I struggled with where I was in my life. I asked “Why?”

  • Why did I get a biology degree?
  • Why was I CEO of a translation business?
  • Why did I enjoy leadership and chats regarding the world of work?
  • Why couldn’t I let go of my social media handle that connotes translation?

I voiced these questions to a dear friend I met on Twitter. It’s interesting when you are so immersed and swirling around in your stuff you don’t see what’s right in front of you.

This was her perspective: It’s all connected.

Biology has everything to do with how the body communicates, translation is communication from one language to another and social media definitely falls into the communication field.

While I stayed home with my kids, I felt incomplete. I have always been a career-minded person. A couple clients hired me to assist them with communicating on social media. My first client said my name was perfect, “You translate my thoughts to the world.” As I kept seeing my world through the lens of my past and felt stuck, these people were not immersed in my story; and therefore, it was easy for them to be forward thinkers.

With these perspectives supporting what I think is my purpose, I show up every day communicating with purpose. I feel aligned and joyful whereas 10 years ago I was over-worked and stressed.

I got validation after listening to the first WBECS Pre-Summit webinar with Judith E. Glaser: “Healthy Cells, Healthy Cultures” in which she discussed the relevance between healthy and unhealthy cells in the body to healthy and unhealthy cultures in the world of work. I see the bridge from biology to communication, I see a bridge from language to communication and I see a bridge from where I am now to working in social media communication thanks to just looking at life through a different lens.

The connections are endless!

Please share:  Has something happened to you that you can look at from a different perspective and see the light?

Go ahead and disagree! Just don’t waste your energy arguing!

Arguing

Daniel BuhrI’m delighted to share a guest post from Daniel Buhr in the series on Disagreement. Daniel was one of the co-authors of the book Energize Your Energize Your Leadership BookLeadership. He works in health and safety at a Fortune 500 Company and shares his passion for leadership at cybuhr.com and @Cybuhr on Twitter.

Heels dug in? Check.

Ears closed? Check.

Mind made up? Check.

Bring on the discussion, I’m ready.  There’s no way I’m going to lose this one!