Several years ago I was asked to serve on a Board that was responsible for overseeing resources from the federal, state and local area.

To learn more, I did a lot of research and then decided to drive to the locations that provided those services.

I found the first location with no problem.

But when I followed my GPS to the second location. I found a police station. Then drove up and down the street and around in circles.

I tried to call but a recording made it impossible to reach a live person. …When I finally asked a police officer, he had no idea where the place was.

Eventually I drove down a little alley. Parked my car and walked into a building – that was right next door to the police station, with old lettering on it that read, “Community Center”. Inside a bunch of cubicles filled a large area that had at one time been used for community gatherings.

It was indeed the location I was looking for.

A few questions later, I learned that the cubicles had been in that location for years.

So I asked how people that had never been there before were expected to find the building when:

1. There was no sign to indicate that someone should turn down the alley.
2. There was no sign on the building.
3. Even their immediate neighbors were unaware of what they did in this building.

Eventually I learned that:

• This building was owned by the city, and at one time only city employees worked here.
• The building I had visited earlier was owned by the state, and at one time only state employees had worked there.

Then legislation changed, requiring the city and the state to share:

• Locations
• Staffing
• Workload
• Branding
• Credit

The city had been given a sign but refused to hang it up because the sign because it didn’t give them credit for their funds, their staff or their contributions.

And that was just the tip of a very big iceberg.

• Silos, politics, and turf wars were the priority.
• Finger pointing and blame games were the norm.
• Staff reflected the divides that were modeled for them.

And the purpose of both locations were buried under drama.

As you read this story were you imagining:

• The bloody, unwinnable battles that employees had to fight each day?
• The energy it took just to go to work, let alone do their jobs?
• The time and talent that were being wasted?
• How many people with needs that were not getting served well?
• How many people with needs that were not being met at all?

Did you find yourself getting irritated at how childish this situation sounds?

Who were you tempted to blame?

At first glance it appeared that the city had issues.

The truth is that divide was so big and the history so buried that I’m not sure:

• Who disrespected who first.
• What the reasons for the lack of trust and respect were.
• If anyone had ever tried to work through the conflict.
• Or when they became so focused on fighting each other – that they forgot what their mission was.

Here’s the thing:

Situations like this exist all over our world.  Many times within the walls of a single organization, with leaders that are on the same payroll.

“ When people see a lack of alignment at the top, they know they don’t have to align. —KEN BLANCHARD

• Pointing fingers and playing the “blame game” or ignoring each other – won’t fix the issue.  It will increase the division.
• As the divide increases: more and more energy, time and resources are wasted.
• Loyalty decreases.
• Your ability to achieve your mission decreases.
• Growth declines.
• And everyone’s stress increases.

“ Whether you are the CEO or lead a small work team, you are ridiculously in charge if you are the leader. And you can certainly protect it and defend it against that which would infect it, derail it, or bring it down. You will get what you create and what you allow. —DR. HENRY CLOUD

YOUR Turn!  

What’s the greatest division you’ve ever witnessed between a group of people that should be working together?

What did you do?

Need help bringing people together?

Check out these posts:

• Rocks, Squiggly Things, Questions and Growth
• Breaking The Cycle of Organizational Chaos and Decline

You’re invited to email chery@consultgiana.com to make an appointment for a free consultation about how we can change the direction of your team.

Image Credit:  iStock 

Last week  I shared a post with my friends – including some of my expat neighbors, about the people from Iran that were arrested after they recorded their own “Happy” YouTube Video.

I shared it because I’ve been really caught up in the news in the past few weeks:

• News of mass abductions.
• News of a death sentence for a woman who married outside of her absent father’s faith, that will be executed once her baby is weened.
• News of others that have been arrested, beaten and jailed because of a stand they have taken.

I shared it because the longer I live as an expat in a land that operates in many of the same ways as Iran, the more I sense a silent pressure building between our little trips outside of this country.

I shared it because my heart hurt when I heard the story of young people trying to do something fun to celebrate the beauty of their country – only to come face to face with some of the reasons their land is often stereotyped.

I shared it because freedom is a core value of mine.  And a cause my family members have given years of their lives to.  (A cause they have been thanked for profusely, by those who have benefitted from their service.

Bottom line…  I shared it from my own perspective. 

My neighbor read it from her own heart and her own perspective. 

Each one of us brought our personal history and values and began commenting.   Before long we were engaged in a rich dialog about what freedom means.  (A discussion that has caused me to think deeply about  my core values, how I would rank them, when they are helpful  and should be acted on, and when they are disrespectful to others.)

Our social media conversation soon sparked the interest of others and expanded.

When the public discussion ended my neighbors and friends on the other side of the world had breathed life into a dream I shared in a SmartBlog post over a year ago.

A dream I imagine everytime I see people and organizations and countries engaged in divisive conflicts.

Think for a minute about a hot topic that is dividing people you love, an organization you support, or a community you live in.   

As soon as you’ve got it, imagine what would happen if…

• We would sit down at a table surrounded by diverse people and really listen?
• We allowed others to share their stories and convictions unapologetically and with passion?
• We left those conversations and examined our own hearts and motives?
• We dived into world history to learn from the past?
• We came back to the table to share what we’ve learned, deeply desiring to better understand?
• We would sit at that table and intentionally look fear (and some squiggly things) in the face and begin to turn each one of those rocks over?

Can you imagine what kind of creativity and energy we would unleash?

Or how many problems we could solve?

Or how many people we could bring together?

Those women just deepened my conviction that this dream is possible!

I invite you to share the dream with me…  And be The Change, You Want To See!  

Image credit:  iStock

A Veteran, whether active duty, discharged, retired, or reserve, is someone who, at one point in his or her life, wrote a blank check made payable to The United States of America, for an amount up to and including his or her own life. Unknown

This Saturday is Armed Forces Day.  In honor of the men and women that have written a blank check for their lives in exchange for our freedom I asked several friends to help us understand their choice…  Adonis Phillips, Joseph Pullen, David Groce and LaDine Roth Cravotta are Veterans, Cathy Herring is a mother of a Veteran.

When I asked each one why they served I received a variety of answers: 

More than once, these former soldiers emphasized how much they believe in our nation’s freedom and how much they valued being a part of being something bigger than themselves and how much they valued the camaraderie.  Additionally…

• Adonis said that being a Marine was the only thing he ever wanted to be.
• Joseph and LaDine spoke of the funds to go to college.
• David spoke of the family tradition

When I asked what the hardest thing was that each one faced the answers were echoes of each other. 

The hardest thing I faced while serving was being away from my family.  I missed the births of both of my nieces (Korea for my oldest niece and Italy for my second niece).  I missed seeing them grow up and missed being able to spend time with them in day to day life.  They have grown into such beautiful young ladies and I missed allot of it.  For me, being in a combat zone is nothing compared to missing my family.  LaDine

The hardest thing I faced was the family separation.  I found out that my wife was pregnant with my son while in Southwest Asia during Desert Shield/Storm.  At that time my only goal was to get home safely to see my son born.  Adonis

Being away from family.  There were many instances in which I missed special events in my family’s life because I was some place other than home. Joseph

The hardest thing I faced was deploying to Operation Desert Storm and not so much in fear of going to war, but the thought of never seeing my wife and newborn son again.  David

The hardest part for me was when he deployed. We were not allowed to know where he was going and might not hear from him for awhile. I knew he was a highly trained soldier, but war is war. I even did CR to help me with my fear. Some days my faith was bigger than my fear, but I had many days that my fear was bigger than my faith. Those were Psalm 91 days.”  Cathy

“ Deployment tears your heart in two, only reconnected at homecoming. —UNKNOWN

When I asked what the most rewarding part of serving was.  The responses varied again. 

• Service to others.
• Developing others.
• Watching those you invested in grow and succeed.
• The travel and the global experience especially for the kids!
• The camaraderie.
• The people you meet!
• Knowing that what you are doing is keeping your friends and family safe.

When I asked what they learned lessons in life and leadership resonated:

Discipline and teamwork to be humble and to not take things that seem trivial for granted.  Adonis

I learned to communicate on an extremely high level. Dealing with people from such an extensive diverse background really opened my eyes and enhanced my communication skills. I learned we don’t live in a “one size fits all” universe and adjusting as you go is necessary to success. I learned that being a leader takes an enormous amount of learning, training, and thought. You have to get in front of people and ask them to do what you yourself are willing to do. I learned that we all share in success in failure by our actions. Actions are definitely louder than words and action should always be the highest form of example.  Joseph

I learned that friends can often be more important than family. I found that Veterans will bend over backwards for each other, and that’s a relationship that rarely exists in Corporate America. David

I learned to listen and be more understanding of people and their situations.  I was raised in a very small town in the midwest and hadn’t experienced much until I joined the Air Force.   I’ve met so many wonderful and diverse people over the years because of my service.  My time in the Air Force has also helped me to be more compassionate for others. We all have no idea of what people have been through in their lives and as a supervisor, I had to learn to always keep an open mind about the people I would encounter.  LaDine

I learned that some soldiers give their lives, but others give their minds. I learned that PTSD is very real and common for so many of our soldiers and vets. My son is finally healing, but he had to come to the conclusion he needed help before that healing process began. Cathy

The most important question I asked these people who were willing to exchange their lives for our freedom was,  “How can civilians do a better job of understanding and supporting Veterans and their families?” 

 Did you know that many studies indicate that 92% of military families felt that the civilian population doesn’t understand or appreciate their sacrifices?

Remember that the liberties you have are because of them.  Joseph

Get to know them. Adonis

Never pretend that you really understand what a veteran has gone through.  David

The best thing a civilian can do is listen to the Soldier and appreciate the sacrifices they made for our country.  David

I needed so much during his service. For someone to tell me that they were praying for him meant so much to me. A hug, a smile, a card, or a simple thank you kept me going. It still means a lot to me to see someone showing honor and pride for our soldiers. When I see one in public, I make a point to tell them thank you.  Cathy

As a Veteran, I still go up to other Veterans and ask them to share their best and worst day of serving in the military.  It helps opens up the door for conversation and allows the Veteran to share their stories.  I feel proud and honored when people do it to me, so I hope that I do the same thing when I do it to others.  LaDine

Today as I sit in a country where I can’t choose what I want to wear when I go out in public, where I can’t drive, where I can’t openly discuss my faith, and where websites are sometimes blocked.  I appreciate more than ever that the little things we take for granted in the U.S. are not a reality for the rest of the world.   

Will you seek out a veteran today, thank them for what they have done for our country and ask them to share their stories?

This story would not be complete without thanking the people in my life that are Veterans.

My Husband Jim was deployed for 14 months when we were still newlyweds.  (You were so worth the wait!)

My Dad Bill.  (I am so proud of you!)

Both of my Grandfathers.

Nearly all of my Uncles – and there are a lot of them!  (With special recognition to my Uncle Larry who volunteered to go to Vietnam in my Dad’s place when I was born early and was hospitalized for a period of time.  Words will never be able to convey the meaning of that gift.)

To numerous cousins and many dear friends.

Your service inspires me.  Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

Image credit: Microsoft

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