What’s your litmus test for people: Honesty or skill?

When do you fold ‘em, walk away or run?

Once upon a time I worked for a charismatic leader with a serious set of skills. Someone I learned from constantly and deeply admired …

  • Until I caught him in a lie.
  • And then a second one.
  • A third one.
  • A fourth one.
  • And finally a fifth one.

The crazy part was – I wasn’t hunting for lies. I literally kept tripping into them – all five in a very short amount of time after years of working together.

When I confronted for the last time. He said, “I don’t know how you keep finding these things out.” No denial. No excuses. No apology.

A short time later – I “fired him” by turning in my notice.


Titled leaders and employees can all be tempted to overlook honesty because of skill.

In a divided world: We have more than two choices

The third option requires our brains AND our hearts

Have you ever had a small child run to you in fear?  (Of the boogeyman under the bed, the barking dog, or the crack of thunder?)

How do you respond?

Do you ignore them?  Do you dismiss them?  Do you call them boogey-phobic, dog-phobic, or noise-phobic?  Do you make fun of them?  Or do you shine a light under the bed and explain why they are safe?  Take them to meet the neighbor’s dog and see that he is friendly?  Or explain how thunder works?

Have you been a titled leader in a business and heard employees expressing concerns about fairness or potential layoffs?

How have you responded?

Do you get defensive and angry that they dare to question you?  Do you blow off their concerns?  Do you talk down to them?  Or do you hear them and respond with understanding, compassion and honesty?

communication, discussion, dialogueHave you watched divisive current events and taken a side?  And then heard from a family member, friend, coworker or neighbor that has taken the other side?

How have you been responding?

Are you ignoring them?  Unfriending them?  Labeling them?  Shouting at them?  Making fun of them?  Or are you seeking first to understand what is driving them?

Great parents, leaders and friends – listen to questions and fears without anger or labels, or a dismissive attitude.  They seek to understand, and then shine a light under the bed and address real and imagined concerns.  They are honest about real challenges and about their commitment to their people.  

Are you waiting on things outside of your control? 9 Tips to keep you going!

We’re in the midst of waiting. Months and months of waiting…

  • In September – We knew we were moving back across the ocean to the land we call home
  • In October – The move was stopped and from morning to night and from day to day, what we were doing and when we were doing it changed, as things changed within the company
  • In early November – we were moving again and it looked impossible not to be home for Christmas
  • Then week after week and weekend after weekend – through Thanksgiving, and Christmas, our Anniversary and New Years we would do what we could do and then wait – on the company, the movers, the government and Harley Davidson
  • 11 days ago – all of our household things were loaded into a container for overseas shipment
  • 7 days ago – our motorcycle was crated and taken to our container
  • It’s almost mid-January and we’re still waiting – for paperwork to clear so we can leave

The emotional roller coaster has been intense:

Feeling helpless about the cycle of division and destruction?

Here's what YOU can do.

Last night right before I went to bed, I learned about the shooting deaths of 3 more police officers – this time in Baton Rouge. It is heart-breaking and tempting to feel helpless, as angry people continue to destroy lives and rock our world with bombings, shootings, and even trucks.

This time felt even more personal, as I used to live in Baton Rouge and drove and worked where the shooting took place.  And in the time I was there, I fell deeply in love with the people, the city and the state of Louisiana.

I woke early this morning and immediately checked the news for updates and prayed.

A short time later, I was reminded that exactly three years ago today I posted an article about pain and anger as I tried to process the Trevon Martin case.

  • Three more years of conflict.
  • Three more years of finger pointing and blaming.

Clearly – What we’re doing isn’t working, as the conflicts are becoming more frequent and more violent.

How Outside Perspectives Can Reveal YOUR Purpose

A few weeks ago I was guest hosting the Lead With Giants Tweet Chat with Dan Forbes.

When we asked the question, “What have you learned from considering another perspective?”  Lori King responded and indicated that 120 characters was not enough space to list all that she has and is learning.

Because perspectives fascinate me, I asked her if she would be willing to write more and allow me to share what she has learned about perspectives in a guest post. I’m delighted that she accepted.

It is fascinating that although I’ve spent a lot of time thinking and writing about how other perspectives increase understanding, and fuel intellectual and organizational growth, Lori’s post emphasizes how the perspective of others can help us find clarity about our purpose.

Below is her story…


Lori A. KingThree years ago, I made the decision to leave a business I started with a partner.

It started with a strong desire to take the summer off to spend time with my elementary aged children. I felt guilty for working when I was at work and I felt guilty at home when there was work to be done, which is all the time when you own a small business. The summer flew by and the next thing I knew, my kids were going back to school. I wasn’t refreshed, revitalized or ready to return to work. Instead, I dreaded going back.

You must do the thing you think you cannot do.I have an angel hanging next to my computer with this quote on it that my business partner gave me:

I had always loved it. I thought about the quote many times over the years applying it to this or that event; but, it never quite fit. As

I write this now, I know what it is I thought I couldn’t do. Leave.

And leave I did.

The process was a painfully slow awakening and one of the hardest things I have done.

While my children were in school, I had time to reflect and listen deeply to figure out what is my purpose in life. I was always too busy before to have the time to think in this manner.

  • I began meditating.
  • I read more books than ever.
  • I attended online webinars about topics I was interested.
  • I attended Twitter chats and became an ambassador to a popular chat on the world of work.

As time went by, I struggled with where I was in my life. I asked “Why?”

  • Why did I get a biology degree?
  • Why was I CEO of a translation business?
  • Why did I enjoy leadership and chats regarding the world of work?
  • Why couldn’t I let go of my social media handle that connotes translation?

I voiced these questions to a dear friend I met on Twitter. It’s interesting when you are so immersed and swirling around in your stuff you don’t see what’s right in front of you.

This was her perspective: It’s all connected.

Biology has everything to do with how the body communicates, translation is communication from one language to another and social media definitely falls into the communication field.

While I stayed home with my kids, I felt incomplete. I have always been a career-minded person. A couple clients hired me to assist them with communicating on social media. My first client said my name was perfect, “You translate my thoughts to the world.” As I kept seeing my world through the lens of my past and felt stuck, these people were not immersed in my story; and therefore, it was easy for them to be forward thinkers.

With these perspectives supporting what I think is my purpose, I show up every day communicating with purpose. I feel aligned and joyful whereas 10 years ago I was over-worked and stressed.

I got validation after listening to the first WBECS Pre-Summit webinar with Judith E. Glaser: “Healthy Cells, Healthy Cultures” in which she discussed the relevance between healthy and unhealthy cells in the body to healthy and unhealthy cultures in the world of work. I see the bridge from biology to communication, I see a bridge from language to communication and I see a bridge from where I am now to working in social media communication thanks to just looking at life through a different lens.

The connections are endless!

Please share:  Has something happened to you that you can look at from a different perspective and see the light?