On Monday morning women from 9 different nations connected in an online Conversation Safari to explore the question… Are you being manipulated?
During that discussion, we talked about different kinds of manipulation.
- Unintentional manipulation – like a guilt trip to get someone to do what you want him or her to do.
- Intentional manipulation – when someone intentionally distorts facts for personal gain.
- Intentional AND strategic manipulation – when someone strategically distorts facts, and creates disruption to accomplish a specific goal.
Most people on the call believe that intentional AND strategic manipulation happens more often than we realize.
A few days later I stumbled into a real life example of their point.
You can be manipulated by:
- A boss, co-worker or an employee
- A family member or a friend
- An elected official or a dictator
- A religious authority
- The media or Hollywood
In our next Conversation Safari we will be discussing manipulation.
Imagine being a new Office Manager for a small company. The first day on the job your new boss, a.k.a the owner, meets you at the office. He stays there for the morning and then leaves.
The other employees work afternoons and weekends. So you’re in a new role, in a new industry. You’re alone at the office, answering phones, and trying to create a weekend work schedule for people you have never met, with less than 4 hours of “training.”
Logic says that you should not be surprised when that first busy weekend goes south. But your new boss loses it!
He’s in his mid forties, tall, long legged and thin. Now his string bean legs are stomping around the office, while he is hollering, blaming and yes – he even throws a pen across the room in frustration. (Not at you – thankfully!) But wow! Just wow!
If his behavior weren’t so immature and shocking – you would have doubled over in laughter at how crazy he looked!
In the heat of the moment you could decide that you have no desire to work for this Boss Baby. And you could walk out the door, put in your notice, begin updating your resume…
Or you could make some uncommon choices:
In business, families, faith-based organizations and communities I’ve continuously witnessed the power of these words:
Together WE STAND. Divided WE FALL.
Prior to moving to Saudi Arabia, my focus on divisive current events was growing. …As was my determination to find ways to bring people together to find solutions.
So I began sharing this dream with others:
A brilliant woman that has been actively serving her community for years – is well known and highly regarded. In spite of that, she will occasionally admit that she struggles with imposter syndrome.
Another woman has chosen to share many of her golden years volunteering in several political roles. She is quick to emphasize how little she knew about politics when she got involved, and how much more she has to learn. In spite of all she doesn’t know, she is often surprised when people all across her state know her name and are recognizing her knowledge and contributions.
Here’s what both ladies don’t realize: