Is coaching yourself possible?

What if you could make your emotions obey your logic?

This weekend, we spent time with my sister and her family.  Several years ago they adopted a three-year-old little boy.

Jason was born with a genetic condition and under the influence of the drugs and alcohol that his birth mother used during her pregnancy.  Collectively, all of those things impact his cognitive abilities.

Jason is a beautiful soul that loves life, people and all kinds of animals.  But there are days that he struggles with emotions, decisions and expressing himself.

Over the weekend, I heard stories from his big sister and his mom about times he is having a challenging day.  In those moments, they’ve heard him coaching himself with words like these:

  • “Gotta be nice, calm down.”
  • “You know that’s disrespectful.”
  • “It hurts her feelings when you do that”
  • “Why do you do that?”
  • “I don’t know why, it’s just hard sometimes”

When I shared the story with my husband he was impressed that Jason was trying to use logic to govern his emotions.

He is a pre-teen with the mind of a little boy and a heart that is more mature than many adults.

The Inspiring STANDS of A Real Leader

For the business, his team and his family

The world is crying out for leaders who build up, nurture and enhance, rather than tear down, exploit & dominate.

Real leaders know that they can’t fight every battle.

But their values are crystal clear long before they are faced with critical decisions. So when a situation demands it they don’t hide, cower or flock…

This post honors the stands of a REAL LEADER that spent several years working overseas.

When the business struggled, this leader:

  • Offered solutions: By reminding peers and executives that they could SIGNIFICANTLY decrease expenses, and increase efficiency, effectiveness, customer retention and revenue by holding people accountable to policies that were already in place.
  • Spoke the hard truth: By pointing to the root cause of issues instead of agreeing with popular thinking that only treated symptoms.
  • Maximized the resources he had: By playing to his strengths and the strengths of his team and leveraging old assets he kept expensive and critical operations running for nearly an entire year without a budget.

When five rounds of layoffs came, this leader practiced:

real-leaders-are-like-eagles-they-dont-flock-you-find-them-one-at-a-time

Real leaders know that they can’t fight every battle.

But their values are crystal clear long before they are faced with critical decisions.

So when a situation demands it they don’t hide, cower or flock…

They STAND…

Against: Wasting time and resources

For: Efficiency, effectiveness and growth

Against: Treating humans like disposable toothpaste tubes

For: People

Against: Manipulators that seek to serve themselves

For: Truth

Those who to stand, risk being:

  • Misunderstood
  • Judged
  • Ignored
  • Replaced

But their commitment to a greater good drives them to lead in an uncommon way.

They are the leaders that inspire generations.

Real leaders are like eagles, they don’t flock… You find them one at a time.

Benefits of having Intentional Discussions about Tough Topics

communication, discussion, dialogue

Titled leaders and employees are happier and more successful when they learn how to have discussions that include deep listening and truth telling.   A failure to do either one equals missed opportunities for learning and growth.  (This is also true for family and community members.)

As a result,  I’ve been encouraging listening, thinking, and dialogue with increasing frequency and leveraging current events as examples of how we can do this.

As you watch the news, are you ever so aware of the pain and the division in our world that it is hard to think about anything else?  

Recently in my home country:  

  • A woman was set on fire because of her faith.
  • Two other women were punched because of their faith.
  • Bombs were set off and people were stabbed for their faith.
  • A man was killed because of the color of his skin.
  • Several men were killed because of the uniform they wear.

Some have responded with fear and hate for everyone that is not like them. 

Others deny that any problem exists and encourage blind acceptance.  


Do we really have only two options???

Fuel Fear or Avoid Fear


Analyzing Kapernick’s Protest: 8 Lessons for Leading Change

+ 3 ways you can help to change the conversation from conflict to solutions

Learn to Lead Positive Change: YOU can make a difference!

Our world needs people who can lead positive change!

It requires unshakable vision, grit and character.  Recently I’ve been watching a story develop in the U.S. that is worth studying – Even if you don’t live there.

For those that aren’t aware of this story, this is a quick look at the facts:  

Colin Kapernick is a professional football player that recently decided to exercise some of the freedom our country grants everyone.

He decided to stay seated during our national anthem, as the rest of the stadium stood and honored our flag and our country.

Colin says he is protesting because, I am not going to stand up to show pride in a flag for a country that oppresses black people and people of color. To me, this is bigger than football and it would be selfish on my part to look the other way. There are bodies in the street and people getting paid leave and getting away with murder.”

His decision created a lot of heated debate with some people criticizing his patriotism, some people defending his right to protest and others applauding his reason for protesting.

It did not take long to discover that Colin chose to wear socks with pictures of pigs in police uniforms during practice, which caused more debate.

A short time later he met with a Nate Boyer, a former Green Beret Soldier and professional football player with his own passion for freeing the oppressed. Their conversation resulted in Colin’s decision to kneel; instead of sitting the next time the National Anthem was played.

Colin has also indicated that he will donate $1 Million to help those affected by police injustices.


Lessons for Change Leaders: